Hawaii, part four

See the photos

After the better part of a day taking care of urgent internet business, and the not-so-urgent business of finding me something to read on the plane home, we finally made it outside to do something Hawaii-y: a trip to Kaloko-Honokohau National Historical Park, on Snorkel Bob’s list of recommended snorkeling locations. While it’s a beautiful place, it’s not so ideal for snorkeling, due to a combination of high surf and jagged rocks. I wore my sneakers instead of fins and braced against the bottom in kind of a football center crouch, watching the fish get swept to and fro by the current.

The park is yet another fantastic black lava landscape, with a lively egret population. Wandering around a field of black, grey, brown and blue boulders, I came across a single huge hunk of pure white coral seemingly placed there by Andy Goldsworthy. Nearby there was a tide pool a good fifteen feet up a cliff above the ocean level. The rocks are placed so that particularly big waves get channeled all the way up there to slosh water in.

On our way back toward the parking lot, we passed a particular stand of trees with about a billion mynah birds chattering in it. The noise was incredible. We talked to a profoundly stoned local guy named Solomon, who shook his three-toned long hair at what a nuisance they are. We got out of there just before an epic rainstorm swept in — it rained so hard that night that the power went out.

The next day was a big one. We got an early start on our final snorkel before returning the gear. We did a second visit to Kahaluu Bay Beach Park right by our condo. It still feels weird that there’s so much intense marine life right there where the cruise ships dock. Two visits out of two, the coral drew blood from me. Sigh. But it was well worth it. Right before we were about to pack it in, Anna spotted a great big sea turtle, nonchalantly munching algae off the rocks in two feet of water, right by the beach.

In the aquarium sea turtles swim around placidly. It was very different seeing one tossed around in the surf, sometimes completely upside down. We tried to keep a respectful distance but the waves kept throwing us towards it.  It didn’t seem to mind us, though. No wonder these guys are endangered. I wanted to be like, dude! We don’t have your best interests at heart. I mean, Anna and I do, but in general, you should avoid us.

So then we returned our masks and fins and got in the car to head over to the other end of the island. The road passes through a lot of farm and ranch territory, largely devoted to the growing of very high-end coffee. Anna wanted a cup, and you’d think that the Kona district would be the place to get a good one. But no. The farmers all just sell beans, no one is brewing any. She finally had to settle for a really gross can of sugary coffee from the supermarket.

The coffee quest wasn’t a total loss, though. We stopped at a particular farm because in addition to advertising coffee for sale, there was also a zebra in a pen out front. We ended up hanging out with Leonard the farmer for the better part of an hour, and it’s a testament to his wondrous eccentricity that we completely forgot to ask about the zebra. Leonard and his wife Sudy keep Watusi cattle, peacocks, guinea fowl and various exotic chickens. There’s a large family of large black semi-feral pigs hanging around their yard at all times. Leonard introduced us to all the animals, told us about being a fifth generation Hawaiian rancher, detailed the proper way to roast a pig (in a pit, wrapped in tea leaves and then banana leaves) and suggested various tourist attractions. We bought some coffee beans, and they also gave us a big good-smelling plumeria flower. Nice people.

We swung around the bottom part of the island and stopped in at a black sand beach that Leonard had recommended. I was thinking how all the black sand and black rocks are kind of goth, but then realized that Hawaii is probably the least goth place in the universe. This beach was backed by a big freshwater pond full of lilypads with Hawaiian ducks swimming in it. On the beach was another sea turtle, chilling out in the shallow water and grazing while being photographed by the better part of a busload of tourists.

Our destination for the drive was Hawaii Volcanoes National Park. We’re staying in the nearby town called, charmingly, Volcano. We got in as dusk was settling, but it was enough time to poke our heads into the park. These volcanoes are very active. Half the park is closed off as of this writing because of poisonous gas conditions. Mostly the scenery is the same lush rainforest as other higher-altitude parts of the island, but then there’s a gigantic crater with steam rising menacingly from various holes and crevices.

The main crater is mostly quiet at the moment but after dark we went to an overlook where you can see a football-field-sized cauldron of lava glowing orange through the mist. Pretty freaky!