In praise of the way we, like, actually speak

Consider these two sentences:

I said, "Whatever."

and

I was like, "Whatever."

What's the difference? My late grandmother would say that one is right and the other is wrong, and that the wrong one sounds uncouth, uneducated, low-class. Is there any difference in their meaning? Mama Kramer would say no, aside from indicating the speaker's social status.

Here's the thing. I'm a well-educated person, as high-status a person as person could reasonably expect to be. I use the 'incorrect' form all the time. I wouldn't do this unless it made practical sense to do so. As I introspect, I realize that the modifier 'like' carries rich grammatical content.

I said, "Whatever."

equals

I recall saying the word, "Whatever."

whereas

I was like, "Whatever."

equals

I recall saying a word or phrase that was either "Whatever" or something functionally identical, fill in the blank.

There's a significant and information-bearing difference between the two statements. One unconsciously asserts certainty, as if the memory is journalistically accurate. The other is explicitly indeterminate, recognizing the essential dynamic and continually evolving nature of memories. To insert the prefix 'like' into a phrase is to indicate your limited certainty of the veracity of what you're saying. For me and my age cohort of Americans at least, this is a clearer representation of our state of mind.

"I be shopping. You be talking on the phone. He be at work. We be at school."

My black neighbors in Brooklyn have improved the English language significantly by making the verb 'to be' consistent with nearly every other verb. The wild irregularity of 'to be' in English stems from a similarly irritating quirk of old German. Presumably this irregularity dates back when German itself congealed from Icelandic and whatever else. To say 'I am, you are, she is, we are' from a root of 'to be' is wildly and perversely illogical. I pity anyone learning English as a second language. Conjugating 'to be' like a normal English verb would remove a significant obstacle from the daily lives of a lot of people. If we're going to ram our language down the world's throat, I'd like to at least offer a language with functional elegance. My only hope is that the regular form of 'to be' enters mainstream usage with a minimum of anguish from the academy.

Black slang has always been one of the most fertile grounds for linguistic innovation. Every significant black slang term follows a similar curve: unknown outside its community of original use, then picked up by hipsters and white negroes like me and repeated to our white friends, then diffused out to the media, then battled fiercely by English teachers until they retire and the next generation of English teachers incorporate the term unconsciously into their everyday speech, thus solidly legitimizing it. See the words 'jazz', 'funk' and 'funky', 'cool', 'corny', 'man' as a greeting, 'hip', 'hopped up', every marijuana term ever, etc.

Steven Pinker's must-read book The Language Instinct distinguishes between descriptivist and prescriptivist viewpoints of language. The prescriptivist establishes rules as to how language should be used, and criticizes usages that don't follow the rules. Descriptivists study the way language is actually used in the world to understand its emergent structure. Pinker argues, and I agree, that to criticize the way humans speak or write is like criticizing the way whales sing or birds build their nests. I would go further and say that prescriptivist fervor usually masks anxiety and hostility towards one's fellow humans, an epidemic pathology in America and places like it.

Why do we hate our natural speech? I think it relates closely to the way we white people tend to hate our sexual and other bodily functions, our monkeylike ancestors, our similarities with our primate cousins and many other aspects of our evolved selves. I could blame Christianity, as Richard Dawkins and others might, but I wonder if that answer isn't too easy. Why did the early Christians dream up this business about immaculate conception and original sin in the first place? No meme can exert that kind of hold on so many humans in so many different times and places without those humans being strongly receptive. I think we're so receptive because of our fundamental hostility and suspicion towards humans from tribes not our own. In prehistory we rarely if ever had to deal with outsiders and foreigners, and now it's a daily fact of life in most of the world. This is all to the best, but we evolve slowly, and it's going to take our emotional hardware a long time to adjust to our present circumstances.

Update: I was pleasantly amazed to see the NY Times agree with me on some of this.

© ethan hein 2007 | back to memebase | back to top